Archive for the 'South' Category

Wearing Black and Gold

I was raised in a small rural Georgia town. I still live in a small rural Georgia town. This is by choice. I love my hometown, just as many of you love your hometown. There’s something about “home.” Small rural Georgia towns offer things that larger cities don’t. For better or for worse, if you love your small rural Georgia town, you think it’s the greatest place on earth. My friends here at TGT and I have a lot of fun with this. They don’t find my small town to be quite as delightful as I do. For some reason, Corbin doesn’t like the fact that our high school football stadium overlooks the Dollar General. But he never turns down a meal at Scott’s BBQ.

Something I think is fairly unique to a small rural Georgia town is the intimate sense of community. Everybody knows everybody, and for the most part loves everybody, even if you don’t like everyone. Kind of like family- you can talk about your own, but nobody else can. Country music songs are written about small rural Georgia towns. You’re also proud of your own. Very proud. When somebody does something good from your hometown, everyone shares in the sense of accomplishment. High school sports are HUGE in the small Georgia towns that dot the rural countryside. Not saying they aren’t huge in the larger cities- clearly they are- but it’s just different. If you’re from a small rural Georgia town, you know what I mean.

Right now, Cochran, Georgia is Wichita State Country. Native son Carl Hall and his Shockers have made an amazing run through the NCAA Tournament. Businesses around town have signs out front encouraging and congratulating Carl. You can’t go anywhere without someone bringing up the topic of Carl and his Wichita State team. For a small town like Cochran (Bleckley County has a population of less than 12,000; Cochran less than 6,000) it’s a really big deal to have a hometown kid to be playing in the Final 4. It’s a huge deal. That kind of thing doesn’t happen often to small rural Georgia towns. Kids from Atlanta play in the Final 4 every year. They play in BCS National Championship games and in all of the major professional leagues. But towns like Cochran don’t have this opportunity very often. That’s why, when it happens, it’s a really big deal. Again, if you’re from a small rural Georgia town, you know what I mean.

carl hall

Tomorrow night, everyone in Cochran will be tuned in to watch Carl Hall and his team take on Louisville. This is the biggest stage, and Cochran is sharing in Carl’s success. It’s fun, and it gives us all a sense of pride. To many, this is just an exciting Final 4 game. For the community of Cochran, it’s more than that. It’s a chance to see one of our own do something incredible. We’re proud of Carl and are having a great time watching him play on national television. This is the kind of thing that unites small towns and brings everyone together.

We’re wishing Carl and his team all the best as they get ready for the biggest game of their lives. Win or lose, we’re proud of you Carl!

Go Shockers!


Lewis Grizzard Wednesday

It’s unwise to try to stand between a true southerner and his beef. Lewis was no fan of activist seeking to substitute other products for beef. One can only wonder what kind of gems he’d have for the PETA crowd today…

Here’s The Beef

In protest for what I consider to be recent unfair attacks on beef, one of my favorite meats, I went out and had myself a thick, juicy T-bone at Long Horn Steaks the other night.

It was great, as usual. I would have eaten two if my stomach would have held another because we beefeaters need to do all we can to tell the wimps and weenies who have put themselves in charge of our lifestyles to go eat a bucket of worms (a.k.a. sushi).

It’s cow meat they’re after now. One group says we’re being cruel by killing cows and chopping them into steaks.

There’s a book out about the evils, both social and physical, of eating beef as well. I refuse to name it here and give it any publicity.

And then, I read a story in the papers about a report from the American Chemical Society saying the natural substance that gives beef its meaty taste has been synthesized in the laboratory and may be used to turn tofu into a substitute for beef.

Do what?

I asked a health nut to tell me what tofu is. It sounds to me like a ballet dance step.

“It’s soybean-based,” she explained.

So let me see if I have this straight.

Some scientist has come up with something in his lab to put in something made out of soybeans, and I’m supposed to eat that instead of beef?

The magic ingredient is BMP. Said the article, “BMP could be used to make imitation beef with little or no saturated fat similar to the way fake crab meat is made.”

Fake crab meat? What’s going on here?

In the first place, I once ate a soybean burger. Another friend of mine, also a health nut, said, “Try this, you might like it.”

Somebody once said the same thing to me about marriage.

The soybean burger was awful, so I went to Wendy’s and got myself a double with cheese to get the taste out of my mouth.

In the second place, when are those self-appointed jerks going to stop jacking us around about our food?

Remember when you were growing up how important it was to eat eggs? “Eat the rest of those eggs, young man,” my mother would say, “so you’ll grow up big and strong.”

Not anymore. Now they say eggs cause diphtheria, not to mention shortness and weakness, so somebody has come out with a fake egg.

I bet a chicken could tell the difference.

Pork has been put down as unhealthy. Some chickens have tumors in them and fish have mercury, and I never knew there was such a thing as fake crab meat until now.

So what’s left to eat? Nothing much. If what we read and hear is true, we’d all be better off if we didn’t eat anything at all, never had sex, abstained from drinking, smoking and gambling, and died on the operating table instead of getting a blood transfusion that could give us AIDS.

Life used to be fun. Now, it’s just one big Don’t.

But I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m going to continue to eat beef and everything else I like. I will never walk into a Long Horn and say, “I’ll have the tofu T-bone, please.”

If doing such a thing kills me, it’ll just have to kill me.

I think I’d rather go suddenly from a beef overdose than live long enough to get really sick and wind up croaking in a hospital bed where they’ve been keeping me alive by feeding me through a tube.

There should be the basic right to live free from as much worry as possible. But how can you, when not a day passes that we aren’t told what’s the latest thing that’s bad for us?

Eat, drink and be merry, I say, for tomorrow you may choke on a big piece of broccoli.

Auburn photos!

Wow! What a weekend in Athens! As far as gamedays, they don’t get much better – a beautiful fall day, time with friends and a smackdown of West Opelika!

Here’s a few photos from the biggest win over the WarTigerPlainsmen in around 50 years, courtesy of Andy Harrison.

Joke of the Day

This was sent to me from my accountant. Enjoy!

The year is 2016 and the United States has just elected the first woman as well as the first female Georgian as president.

A few days after the election the president-elect calls her father and says, ‘So, Daddy, I assume you will be coming to my inauguration?’

‘I don’t think so. It’s a 16 hour drive, your mother isn’t as young as she used to be, and my arthritis is acting up again.’

‘Don’t worry about it Daddy, I’ll send Air Force One to pick you up and take you home. A limousine will pick you up at your door.’

‘I don’t know. Everybody will be so fancy. What would your mother wear?’

‘Oh, Daddy’, replies the president-elect, ‘I’ll make sure she has a wonderful gown custom made by the best designer in Washington.’

‘Honey,’ Dad complains, ‘you know I can’t eat those rich foods you and your friends like to eat.’

The President-to-be responds, ‘Don’t worry Daddy. The entire affair is going to be handled by the best caterer in Washington, I’ll ensure your meals are salt free Daddy, I really want you to come.’

So Dad reluctantly agrees, and on January 20, 2017, the first woman and first Georgian is being sworn in as President of the United States. In the front row sits the new president’s Dad and Mom. Dad notices the Supreme Court Justice sitting next to him and leans over and whispers, ‘You see that woman over there with her hand on the Bible, becoming President of the United States.’

The Justice whispers back, ‘Yes I do.’

Daddy says proudly, ‘Her brother played football for the Georgia Bulldogs.’


Closing the Book on the 2011 Masters

Sunday at Augusta proved once again that you can simply never tell what’s going to happen at the Masters. Further, the tournament, as they say, doesn’t start until the back 9 at Augusta.

A few thoughts….

-        I couldn’t have been more wrong in my prediction early Sunday. I stated that it was Rory’s to lose and that one of 3 names would have to get white hot to catch him. Well what do you know…Tiger made his early surge and by the time everyone was on the back 9 there was a field of 10 or so golfers in the hunt. At least I was somewhat correct in saying that Choi or Scott could be in it; they were very much in contention all day on Sunday.

-        I can’t say enough about Tiger. He gave the game of golf exactly what it needed on Sunday. I came unglued when he made his eagle and continued to be amazed as he torched the front 9. I only wish he had held serve on the back 9. But my did he put on a clinic that front 9. I said all year long leading up that Tiger would factor in to The Masters tournament, and did he ever.

-        I did not see young Schwartzel birdieing the final four holes to go on and win. He deserved it, was a gracious winner, and I am very proud of him.

-        Phil disappointed me. All week. But it’s still fun to watch him play golf, and it was fun to watch him slip the Green Jacket on Schwartzel in Butler Cabin.

-        Back to Tiger…did you see the 3 wood he hit? Wow!

-        Rory McIlroy, poor kid, just had a rough day. But the talking heads of the media world need to lay off. The kid is 21 years old. 21! He will get his one day, and I’ll be pulling for him. He’s a great kid and an even greater golfer. This implosion WILL NOT affect his game negatively. He’s too young for that to happen. The sky is the limit for Rory. He won’t ever be a Tiger Woods, but I predict he will win at least 4 majors in his career.

-        Sunday at Augusta was exactly what it should have been. An absolutely perfect day for golf, coupled with drama you can only find at Augusta National.

-        Adam Scott and Jason Day both played like they deserved to win down the stretch. Jason Day played 18 like a Masters Champion, and Scott was just incredible.

-        I say it every year, but this Masters was one of the best I’ve ever watched. Can’t wait for 2012.

-        One more thought; I thought it was neat with the Japanese amaeteur at the end in Butler Cabin. Golf is truly an international sport today and will only become more so.

Congrats again to the 26 year old Charl Schwartzel for winning The Masters and to Chairman Payne for running another wonderful event. What a tournament! Hope you enjoyed as much as I did.


Masters Sunday

Masters Sunday is perhaps the most exciting day of the year. In fact, it ranks just below Easter as my favorite day.  This Masters Sunday should be no different.

The anticipation and drama that we so often see on the back 9 at Augusta National on Sunday may not be there this year if young Rory McIlroy continues to play golf the way he has the prior 3 days. Some folks say that the Masters begins on the back 9 on Sunday, but this year it could be finished before the last group even gets to No. 10.

I was mistaken about Phil; I thought he’d be in it this year but he simply couldn’t follow up last weeks performance. Doesn’t help that I’m hitting my driver better than he’s hitting his right now. Tiger both suprised and disappointed me yesterday. I fully expected a 68 out of him to stay just on the fringe of McIlroy’s lead. I’m afraid he’s out of it too.

The only drama I see potentially playing out today is if Cabrera, Choi or Scott just get white hot with the flat stick and Rory shoots even or worse on the front 9. Scoring is going to be impossible today unless you get a few lucky rolls on the green, so I honestly feel that all Rory has to do is hold ground. Cabrera has been around though, as have Choi and Scott to a lesser extent, but they know the grounds well also. 4 and 5 strokes are not too much for these guys to get back on Masters Sunday.

Tiger nor Phil are in it to win it this year, but there’s plenty to watch for (and listen to for all you Jim Nantz fans.) Go to church then sit back and enjoy Masters Sunday.


Masters Saturday

He who doubted Tiger raise your hand.

After a beautiful round of golf yesterday, Tiger is, as Verne says, on the prowl. Young McIlroy is playing spectacular golf though, and if he keeps this up no one will catch him. Unless Jason Day fires off another 64 of course.

Each day at the Masters gets better and better. Today will be the best round yet. Moving day, as some say. Tiger made his move yesterday, you can bet a bbq sandwich that Phil makes his today. Phil will tee off 2 hours before the leaders and will probably post something for them to shoot at.

I love Masters Saturday. Today the tournament really begins. Me, well I’m headed to the country club to squeeze in 18 before Phil tees off. Enjoy your Masters Saturday.


Friday at the Masters

Masters week is probably my favorite week of the year. The only other week that compares is Georgia-Florida week. But I just love the Masters.

Masters Thursday was yet another incredible day. Most of the big names played well enough to still be around. You had your typical few golfers go low, setting the bar headed into the cut. In my opinion, the Masters starts getting competitive today.

Unlike Corbin, I love Phil. I have pulled for Phil for over a decade. I’ll never forget his first Green Jacket victory. How could anyone forget the embrace with Amy after his third. I’m pulling for him to become the 4th golfer to win four Green Jackets this week. My wife says I have a man crush on him (and maybe I do.)

Today will be an exceptional day for golf. I look for both Tiger and Phil to position themselves well heading into the weekend. These young superstars of the sport will all be around as well. I will do little else Saturday and Sunday than sit in my recliner and watch golf all day long.

I don’t think we’ll see the same scores today that we saw yesterday, but with nice conditions I think we’ll still see a lot of rounds in the upper-60′s.

Work is secondary today…it’s all about Masters Friday. Enjoy the greatest tournament on earth; work can wait until Monday.


More Proof on SEC Dominance

As if the run of MNC’s is not enough proof, a quick look at Mel Kiper’s and Todd McShay’s mock drafts will quickly tell you where the best players are coming from.

Kiper has kids from the SEC going 1-3, and McShay has 5 SEC players going in his top 10. This includes our own AJ Green going 4th overall to the Cincinnatti Bengals.

It seems that as each year passes, the SEC is getting stronger and stronger, pulling away from the pack. Even this year’s NC game, though close in terms of final score, showed an SEC school really dominate the entire game against a team America said was the fastest and most athletic in the country.

I know it’s a forgone conclusion at this point that we are the mecca of college football, but it’s fun to remind ourselves of the blessings we have each fall living in the South. Every single game is full of NFL talent, and simply put, they’re just fun to watch.

Go Dawgs!


Lewis Grizzard Wednesday

Ahh, the day after Election Day. Or the Wednesday after Georgia-Florida. Whichever way you prefer to look at it is fine by me. Yesterday was a big day in Georgia. It was also a very bad day to be a Democrat. Too early to tell if that’s good or bad yet. But we can all agree that it’s a good thing Rep. Pelosi will no longer be our Speaker of the House. But I digress.

Today, I wanted to share an article with you in honor of Lewis, but not written by Lewis. My favorite political blog, Peach Pundit, ran this article back in 2006. They made mention to Lewis…actually they titled it “I Miss Lewis Grizzard”. But in the post they had an article by Dick Yarbrough. It’s the closest thing to Lewis we’ve seen since he went on to bluer skies. I thought it fitting on the day after the election. Hope you enjoy.

I Miss Lewis Grizzard

Lewis Grizzard had a gift of summing up Georgian’s thoughts even when we weren’t quite sure what we were thinking.  While he is sorely missed down here on Earth, I am sure he is smiling today on Dick Yarborough who did a pretty good impression of him in this column…

Primary Results Indicate November Elections May Be Going to the Dogs

By Dick Yarbrough

(7/26/06) The state primary elections are history — with the exception of a few runoffs — and that means we get a brief respite from all the mud-slinging political ads on television. Now it’s back to screaming car dealers and commercials about medical problems that shouldn’t be mentioned in a family newspaper. Better enjoy it while you can. You know that the political strategists are loading up their slop buckets and getting ready for the November general election.

For whatever reason, only about 20 percent of us voted in the primaries. That is a shameful statistic. I was in Iraq when people got their first chance to vote in a democratic election. Some walked 20 miles for the privilege. We won’t even get our lazy rumps off the couch.

In the Republican primary for governor, incumbent Gov. Sonny Perdue easily dispatched Ray McBerry, the choice of the flaggers. Flaggers are high-fiving each other over the 50,000 votes their guy received. I hate to burst their bubble, but Sheila the Family Wonderdog could get 50,000 votes without missing her daily 22-hour nap. Perdue got 370,000 votes, or 88 percent, which qualifies in my book as a rout. Flaggers have been telling me for several years that 79 percent of Georgians have said they want a chance to vote on a state flag referendum that includes the Confederate battle flag. Maybe so, but the flag issue wasn’t a blip in the primary and won’t be in the November general election either.

Meanwhile, back in the 21st century, Gov. Perdue will face Lt. Gov. Mark (The Big Guy) Taylor in the general election. Perdue says he will run on his record, which includes spaying a couple of dogs and giving an elephant a physical. Taylor has chosen not to run on his record because he didn’t do anything worth talking about while lieutenant governor. Perhaps a good campaign strategy for Taylor would be to charge Perdue with animal cruelty because of the poor dogs that lost their manhood, their self-respect and some other stuff I’m not going to mention at the hands of the governor. (Note to Taylor’s campaign team: I’m giving you this idea free of charge.)

Replacing Taylor as lieutenant governor will be either Gainesville Republican State Sen. Casey Cagle or the Democrats’ Jim Martin of Atlanta, a former state commissioner of Human Resources, or former State Sen. Greg Hecht of Jonesboro. Martin and Hecht are in a runoff, if anybody besides their closest relatives care. Cagle beat slick-as-oil Ralph Reed, who happened to be passing through Georgia on his way to the White House. Reed was the choice of the Christian Coalition, former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani, former U.S. Sen. Zell Miller, and a bunch of Republican fat cats. He just wasn’t the choice of the voters. Reed claimed to be an anti-gambling advocate at the same time he was helping disgraced Washington lobbyist Jack Abramoff protect the gambling interests of some Indian tribes. I guess he thought we were too dumb to notice the irony of that.

In Georgia’s 4th Congressional District, Ambassador to Outer Space Cynthia McKinney is in a runoff with an earthling named Hank Johnson, a former DeKalb County commissioner. Currently stumping the district for the ambassador is media publicity hound Cindy Sheehan, as well as Darth Vader and E.T., the Extra Terrestrial — none of whom are qualified to vote in the district. Needless to say, I have a great interest in the outcome of this race. The ambassador is worth a minimum of four columns a year — six, if she slaps a police officer.

The primary results have been a bit unsettling for me. If I lose Ray McBerry, Ralph Reed and our Ambassador to Outer Space as regular column fodder, this would leave me with only President Peanut and his unsolicited and self-important pronouncements, bleeding heart liberals who think George Bush is responsible for all the world’s ills, including psoriasis, and people who talk too loud on their cell phones in the checkout line at the grocery store. If that happens, I just may be forced to spay dogs for a living.

the grit tree


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